On the subject of the oddities of Melbourne...and (possible) dumpster sex...
In 3 days I will have lived in Melbourne, FL for one whole year. My first impression of Melbourne when I came down for my job interview was that it is filled with old people; not only old people, but old people who like to pull out in front of you while you're doing 45 MPH. This happened to me twice while I was down here for one day for a job interview. The funny thing is, now that I live down here I haven't noticed the old people as much, except at Publix (it hasn't rained there again). I think it's because I'm at work all day, and they come out in the day.
The next recent oddity is the phonebook graveyard on Dairy road. It seems to be a strange place for phonebooks to go to die. I don't know if they fell of a truck or what (there seem to be more of them every time I drive down Dairy), but phonebook carcasses litter the road. It's sad. I think they may be Talking Phonebooks though, so I won't take the time to mourne them.
The last weirdness tops it all. Late one night I went with Matt to Taco Bell next to Pier 1 on 192. We parked facing Pier 1 and were surpised to see a group of teenagers hanging out on the dumpster out back, including a couple making out. Now, what comes to normal people's minds is "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING MAKING OUT ON A DUMPSTER?" What on earth would possess people to think that a great hang-out spot would be a giant box filled with trash? An even better question, how do you convince a member of the fairer (and generally smarter) sex to join you in an intimate act upon said container of refuse.
We speculate that the conversation must have gone something like this:
"Hey, sweets, wanna do somethin' special tonight?"
"Uh huh."
"You wanna go to the dumpster?"
"Ummmmmmmmmm..."
"No baby, it's not like that. This is the Pier 1 dumpster. This is quality. You know I wouldn't take you to that one again."
"Ok, I guess."
A more realistic explanation probably includes drugs. But you have to wonder, what type of teenagers are these, even if they're higher than kites. One also has to wonder how far things went after we left. The possibilties are scary. We didn't stick around to find out.
The next recent oddity is the phonebook graveyard on Dairy road. It seems to be a strange place for phonebooks to go to die. I don't know if they fell of a truck or what (there seem to be more of them every time I drive down Dairy), but phonebook carcasses litter the road. It's sad. I think they may be Talking Phonebooks though, so I won't take the time to mourne them.
The last weirdness tops it all. Late one night I went with Matt to Taco Bell next to Pier 1 on 192. We parked facing Pier 1 and were surpised to see a group of teenagers hanging out on the dumpster out back, including a couple making out. Now, what comes to normal people's minds is "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING MAKING OUT ON A DUMPSTER?" What on earth would possess people to think that a great hang-out spot would be a giant box filled with trash? An even better question, how do you convince a member of the fairer (and generally smarter) sex to join you in an intimate act upon said container of refuse.
We speculate that the conversation must have gone something like this:
"Hey, sweets, wanna do somethin' special tonight?"
"Uh huh."
"You wanna go to the dumpster?"
"Ummmmmmmmmm..."
"No baby, it's not like that. This is the Pier 1 dumpster. This is quality. You know I wouldn't take you to that one again."
"Ok, I guess."
A more realistic explanation probably includes drugs. But you have to wonder, what type of teenagers are these, even if they're higher than kites. One also has to wonder how far things went after we left. The possibilties are scary. We didn't stick around to find out.
posted by Michael at
6:01 PM
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