On the subject of 29:59...and getting old...

Today I post with great shame. A few weeks ago a friend convinced me to participate in the Harris Family Medical Center 5K. It's been almost 2 years since I last ran in a 5K (I have a post about it from a while back, where I post with pride). Since then I've gotten horrendously out of shape. My goal for this run was simply to beat 30 minutes, and to not throw up afterwards (I've always thrown up afterwards; you're welcome for me sharing that). So on some cold Saturday morning a couple of weeks ago I ran again, and walked, and kind of jogged, then walked some more, then ran, then walked, then...you get the idea. As I reached the last turn and the finish line was in sight, with its giant digital clock overhead, I realized that despite thinking that 30 minutes was too lofty about two miles into the race (I crossed mile one at 8 minutes and mile two at 21 minutes), I still had 5 seconds left to beat that 30 minute goal. I sprinted with all that was left in me, and my official time was 29:59 (one second to spare!). I was proud at the time, but after reading my posts from two years ago, I need to get more exercise.

Also, for the record, I managed not to throw up, but just barely. I also realized why the spontaneous hurling always occurs after a race. It's the sudden stop at the end that does it. It's that funneling so they can take your number, and then the slowing down and stopping while your adrenalin and blood are still pumping furiously. It's also that guy that I ignored trying to stop everyone at the end to give them high fives. Random high five guy, I'm sorry for ignoring you, but seriously, if I stopped, you'd get a high five and probably need a new pair of shoes.  

On the subject of true Florida orange juice...

This isn't so much a blog post as a shout-out to to the true taste of Florida orange juice as it comes from Harvey's groves. Florida oranges are supposed to be the best (well, at least people in Florida claim so), but I've always been somewhat disappointed with the "Florida" orange juice you find in supermarkets. But down here in Melbourne we have a local provider called Harvey's, and they supply the finest orange juice I've ever tasted. Here's to you Harvey's groves, for spawning my new addiction to your citrusy goodness.

P.S. Minute Maid sucks! I believe that Tang (mmm, Tang!) has more of a right to call itself orange juice.

On the subject of the last year and a half of my life...

I realize that keeping up with a blog hasn't been one of my specialties in life. I found it interesting to see all of my old posts when I migrated them from MySpace. A few things have happened in the last 19 months since I put up a serious (well, relatively) post.

1. Around a week after my last post I purchased a kitten and named her Chloe. Ever since then I've been a cat owner and loving it.

2. About three weeks after that post I met a nurse through Yahoo! personals and had a very interesting first date (those who know me personally know the story). We continued dating and on February 15th, 2008, we were engaged. In two months exactly from this post we will be married. 

3. I still work at the same job as I did before. I'm still a software engineer. I've changed positions, for the worse, but I'm hanging in there.

Those are probably the highlights. I'm sure more tidbits of my past will be revealed over time (as I remember them).

On the subject of migrating my blog from MySpace...

If you've ever been to this blog, and let's face it, you haven't, you'll know that is was empty. All of my previous blog posts were on MySpace. Well, seeing as how I never use MySpace any more, and I've only recently joined Facebook, I decided that I would move all of my old posts to this blog and continue it here. I know its been a while, but for some reason I feel the urge to share myself with the world again and comment on society as I see it. From my small view of it, MySpace is losing traction to Facebook, and no one I know really uses it any more. I don't know if Facebook has a blogging system other than those short little messages, so I've decided to give Blogger a try as my location for world commentary.

On the subject of all batteries go to heaven...

I love odd work conversations. I love odd conversations in general.

Today Matt pointed out that for most household items we claim that they "break," "fall apart," "stop working," etc. But not batteries. Batteries "die." Batteries can be said to be dead. How often have you said the remote wasn't working because the "batteries were dying." This lead me to the inquiry, "do batteries have souls?" What happens when they pass on? Is there a certain level of hell deigned just for old Duracells? Do Energizers get to go to heaven? 

I pondered these questions *waaaaaay* too much at work. Brian helped me out and pointed out that batteries live their lives essentially to die. Batteries are selfless. Sure, some of them are allowed long lives (I haven't checked the smoke alarm lately, but I'm pretty sure they're still kicking it), but slowly they sacrifice themselves to give "life" to something else. It's kind of noble of them. For their selfless nature, I have to assume heaven is full of D-cells and 9-volts.

But then I began to wonder. What about rechargables? Is that like reincarnation to them, or is this just a long purgatory. Do they yearn for the day that they can no longer hold a charge and can pass on to the next world? 

Anyway, I was really bored...

On the subject of online dating services...

Hmm, well, I'm willing to admit that I have signed up for a few of the online matching services out on the net. I do so for a number of reasons, which I will proceed to explain so I don't seem so pathetic. 

First, I live in Melbourne, FL. So far, single women don't seem to live in Melbourne, FL. 

Second, I'm told that to meet the few that do exist you have to go to bars, but I'm not really into the bar scene, and will frankly admit that in general the bar-going types are not really what I'm interested in.

So this lead me to online dating sites. Honestly, if you are member of one of these sites you have to have a basic computer skill (well, possibly), which makes you somewhat more of a geek than those who hang around in bars. I consider that a good thing. 

So, the reason I'm posting this isn't to point out how pathetic I am or to post a defense; the reason I'm posting this is to point out my observations of the sites and their users. Shall I begin? Ahem.

First, the general process of using them is evil. All of them let you sign up for free, but in order to talk to anyone you have to pay through the nose. They edit your personal information just to make sure there is no way anyone can contact you, or you them, without paying their fees. I suppose there's a point (i.e. so they can make lots of money), but it still seems invasive. "Congratulations, you've found the girl/guy of your dreams. There's no way you will ever contact her/him without forking over. MWAHAHAHA." I'm sure that's what their creators are thinking.

As for the people, I have a few comments/suggestions. 

1)  Post a photo. It's easy. Not posting a photo makes people assume you don't want to be seen and wonder why. 
2) If you post a photo, make sure it is right side up. I'm sure someday the hope is to see you horizontally, but not in the introduction.
3) What's with all of the swingers? It's really depressing to see someone nice's profile and get to the very end with the line "Oh, and I'm happily married and we're looking for someone to join us." Creepy.
4) Speaking about keeping things to the end, be up front about important things like kids. Waiting for the last line to put "Oh, and I have 5 kids" seems a bit underhanded. As an addendum, don't list "No Children" on your profile and then mention it in the body. That seems dishonest, and honesty is a cornerstone to a good relationship.
5) If you have kids, do not post their pictures instead of yours on your profile. It's unnerving to see a page of women and then some 6-year-old boy. You're trying to find a future mate, not a pedophile. (This reminds me of the John Fogerty song "I Will Walk With You", which sounds like a very romantic date until you realize he's singing to his daughter, at which point everything just seems creepy.)
7) Why do so many of the names have "redneck" in them. Is there that big a demand for rednecks?

Anyway, those are just my observations.

On the subject of the oddities of Melbourne...and (possible) dumpster sex...

In 3 days I will have lived in Melbourne, FL for one whole year. My first impression of Melbourne when I came down for my job interview was that it is filled with old people; not only old people, but old people who like to pull out in front of you while you're doing 45 MPH. This happened to me twice while I was down here for one day for a job interview. The funny thing is, now that I live down here I haven't noticed the old people as much, except at Publix (it hasn't rained there again). I think it's because I'm at work all day, and they come out in the day.

The next recent oddity is the phonebook graveyard on Dairy road. It seems to be a strange place for phonebooks to go to die. I don't know if they fell of a truck or what (there seem to be more of them every time I drive down Dairy), but phonebook carcasses litter the road. It's sad. I think they may be Talking Phonebooks though, so I won't take the time to mourne them.

The last weirdness tops it all. Late one night I went with Matt to Taco Bell next to Pier 1 on 192. We parked facing Pier 1 and were surpised to see a group of teenagers hanging out on the dumpster out back, including a couple making out. Now, what comes to normal people's minds is "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING MAKING OUT ON A DUMPSTER?" What on earth would possess people to think that a great hang-out spot would be a giant box filled with trash? An even better question, how do you convince a member of the fairer (and generally smarter) sex to join you in an intimate act upon said container of refuse. 

We speculate that the conversation must have gone something like this:

"Hey, sweets, wanna do somethin' special tonight?"
"Uh huh."
"You wanna go to the dumpster?"
"Ummmmmmmmmm..."
"No baby, it's not like that. This is the Pier 1 dumpster. This is quality. You know I wouldn't take you to that one again."
"Ok, I guess."

A more realistic explanation probably includes drugs. But you have to wonder, what type of teenagers are these, even if they're higher than kites. One also has to wonder how far things went after we left. The possibilties are scary. We didn't stick around to find out.

On the subject of 24:29...

Today I'm posting with great pride. It's been a long time since I've run a 5K; it's been nearly 10 years. I realize that I've gotten older, and my mind and body have already started that downward slide. I'm not a teenager anymore. Ten years ago my best time in a 5K was 22 minutes and some-odd-seconds (they could have been even, but I don't remember). I've tried to keep in shape a bit with occaisional sports and running a few times a week. Today I got to see the results of my "maintenance " exercise. Today, at the Melbourne Arts Festival 5K, I clocked in at 24 minutes and 29 seconds. It's not a great time, but it is one I am very happy to accept. I never time myself when I run and my honest best hope time I was going for was around 26 minutes. 

I don't know if it was the time, or the endorphins, but it felt good too. And there was free fruit at the end :)

I will admit that I did have to walk for about a minute. Not due to my legs, which were happy to keep pace, but my weakness is a need for more aerobic exercise. It was the cardio part that killed me, so I need to work on that. I think if I can last running the entire thing without walking, I can probably run it in 22 minutes and some-odd-or-even-seconds, and then it will almost be like being a teenager again (except it will hurt excessively more the next day).

On the subject of Bowling for Soup and Ticketmaster...

Wow. I just saw Bowling for Soup for the second time tonight, and it was an awesome show. The first BFS show I saw was really good, but this time I was near the front of the crowd, so I think that energy makes the show better. BFS is also a great band for engaging the crowd (probably the best I have ever seen), and that really ramps up the performance. I recommend that if you like any of their songs and haven't seen them live you grab the next opportunity. The opening acts, Ronnie Day and Quiet Drive, were OK. Ronnie Day was missable, but I really enjoyed Quiet Drive and I'm kicking myself now for not stopping by the merch booth at the end and picking up their CD. I'll have to find it online.

---BEGIN RANT MODE ---

This will be the little section of my blog where I will stand up on my theoretical soapbox and complain. I was happy that the BFS concert used a ticket vendor called TicketWeb to sell online tickets. It's good to see competition for Ticketmaster (how I loathe thee, let me count the ways). I recently tried to purchase Dave Matthews Band tickets for a concert in September. I tried to originally get 4 tickets in row, but of course it only offered me lawn seating (not real covered seats). It wasn't until I went down to single seats that I actually was offered covered seating. The site is also horribly slow. I waited 11 minutes to find out I was only going to be offered lawn seating. All of the good seats get snagged up incredibly quickly (and strangely enough always seem to end up in the hands of scalpers). There has to be some way to fix this. 

So, that's the question. How can Ticketmaster be improved? How about releasing tickets in stages and not announcing when the tickets will be released. Save some good seats for later stages as well, so you don't have to have clicked at the very super instant millisecond that tickets became available to get good seats. So that a few days after the initial release you could search and have a chance of getting good seats. 

I have no other solutions at the moment, so I will step down from my little complaining box.

---END OF RANT---

On the subject of cooking for yourself...

I've found that since I've moved into an apartment on my own I've fallen into the single guy trap of not cooking much for myself. I would like to hereby blame society for this. It's not that I don't like cooking. I actually really enjoying cooking. It's just that I don't want to make six servings of the same thing at one time. It would be a waste to, since I probably won't eat it all, and I don't like wasting food. Even side dishes provide too much for a single meal if eaten alone, and I don't want to eat a side dish as my entire meal.

You know those single serving boxes of cereal, the kind you always took on camping trips or ate at school. It was the little box that you tore the front off of and then poorly shredded the wax paper wrapper inside, just so you could pour milk into it and use it as a bowl. Those seem like a great idea, not because it can be used as a bowl (the ultimate in bachelor laziness for after-meal clean-up), but because it provides the appropriate serving. Why can't they make Hamburger Helper in those size boxes. Why must beef/chicken be sold in one lb. increments. I want to be able to buy a 1/4 lb. of beef and one of those tiny boxes of Hamburger Helper. Then I would cook for myself.

I demand single-serving portions for meals that you cook. Not just something out of a can, but something with actual preparation steps that provides a feeling of accomplishment. 

Oh, and if you ever want someone to cook you a meal, just ask, I'm probably up for it. I love cooking for company, since it's the only time I really get to cook large portions and they will be eaten (beware that I may send you away with leftovers).